was destined to be a failure. That day was miserable. I only sold six subscriptions, and nearly all of them were "sympathy subscriptions." I felt so terrible I almost started to cry.

     The day before I'd sold eleven subscriptions and the boss had yelled at me for not selling enough. Today I'd only sold six - - what was he going to say now? Afterwards, I learned that in situations like that, you could get your friends to fill out false subscription forms for you, to help get throguh the toughest of times. By soliciting false subscriptions, you would have to pay them out of your own pocket. Sometimes you would have to use half your earnings to pay for false subscriptions. But of course the boss would have no legitmate reason to complain.

     The next day I was afraid to see the boss. When I told him I'd sold six subscriptions, his face immediately flushed red. His whole face was red with anger. He hit the table with his hand and said "Six subscriptions? What did you come here for? You didn't even pay the full secuirty deposit. The only reason I'm keeping you here is because I feel sorry for you. Didn't you promise me you'd work even harder than the others?" He took a mouthful of tea and counted the slips again. "People like you are useless! Get out, get out of here immediately!"

     I couldn't sit there and listen to him scold me like that, as though I was made of wood. I felt a wave of rage and resentment wash over me. But as soon as I thought of my first month in Tokyo, when I couldn't find a job, or when I thought about the three million unemployed people in this country, I clenched my jaw and made a resolve to keep my mouth shut and endure this. "I'm sorry, please forgive me. I'll work harder in the future... " I didn't think I should have had top work so hard. I'd cover almost every street, land and alley in the past few days. I think I'd tried to sell subscritpions at nearly every single home.